Developing Authentic Leaders

There is a plethora of research on what characteristics define the truly great leader. Integrity, honesty, vulnerability, vision are all descriptors of the outstanding leader. There is also a prevailing belief (in which I concur), that you cannot ascend to the highest level of leadership without being relational. 

At Vianney we take the leadership development of our students seriously!  For years our students have been required to take a freshmen leadership course, we were the 1st school in St. Louis to have our upper-level leadership course approved for dual-enrollment through Drury University, and the list of leadership opportunities is extensive and impressive! 

One thing we always stress to our young men during their leadership development is that Relationships Matter! Gifted leaders, ones who are well-respected, trusted and liked, understand that relationships must also be authentic.

Weak or passing fad leaders confuse authenticity with the art pleasing the people. Pleasing people is more often about self gain, about getting votes or being liked (although those might be great end results). Authentic relationships are formed by leaders who do the right thing, make tough decisions and have difficult conversations. Building authentic relationships is a great skill for teenagers to develop and for all of us to continuously work on and improve.

The challenges of effective leadership are immense. Chris Lowney writes in his book, Heroic Leadership, "it is not easy for the leader to set the course, get everyone onside with the direction and then maneuver in and around the barriers that exist to ascertain the preferred future."

Getting people committed to the cause requires authentic relationships. The leader’s ability to build effective and authentic relationships with one’s employees,colleagues and the general community is simply non-negotiable. Authentic relationships where everyone is committed to a common cause has been a strength of Vianney since our establishment in 1960 and something we hope to continuously work on and improve for many years to come! 

I highlight the word “authentic” because too often relationships are viewed as one way, shallow and superficial. In other words the default becomes to please others. Employee groups or leaders sometimes revert to the position that if you truly cared about this relationship you would do “X”. This is simply not authentic. In fact it's is immature and dare I say, "adolescent?"

Effective and authentic relationships are mutually beneficial and based on respect. It is not centered on getting your own way and is not structured with the mentality of win/lose. It is also not without struggle, tough decisions and disappointment. Authentic relationships value the messiness of the interactions and understand the complexity of leadership life. 

It is crucial for students to recognize upon graduation that it is impossible to please
everyone. They need to understand that any decision made will have people lined up on both sides of the fence. It is a no win scenario and therefore should be avoided at all costs. However, authentic relationships allows leaders to make tough decisions without major fallout. Pleasing people is fleeting and superficial at best. It requires no strong and enduring commitment which is why these leaders typically don’t have a long and successful shelf life and never create a legacy!

Our goal in developing Men of Character & Accomplishment is that they will grow in to leaders who will be authentic in their relationships rather than simply desiring to please people. That's the legacy we hope to leave behind.